Tryin' a little too hard quote of the moment

How does one use words to describe a festival designed to leave you speechless? Well, since we are highly paid professionals here, we'll give it a try: Electric Daisy Carnival, the world's largest electronic dance music festival, is so full of eye-slappin,' earhole-blasting whiz-banger-y, it's like waterboarding your senses in Red Bull and/or outfitting your adrenal gland with a booster rocket and launching that bad boy to the moon — but only if the moon were, in fact, a giant glowing subwoofer.

--Jason Bracelin