practical learning

you'd *think* there is nowhere in your life where chemistry, biology and sociology meet, but when you reason that you're forgetting the fine art of cleaning out your refrigerator.

you're all adults here, so rather than actually teaching you anything, let's do this university style and just immediately drop into an exam. to the best of your ability, answer the following statements with either "true" or "false:"

1. nothing should be growing on the inside of a refrigerator. ever. even if you might otherwise describe it as "white and friendly looking."

2. breathing bread mold is good for you because it's the same as getting half of a penicillin shot.

3. left covered with saran wrap on a plate for five years, a piece of salmon will lose roughly half its mass, but turn a much prettier shade of orange.

4. in situ, milk should never be described as "foamy."

5. left over tortellini gets white and "frosty" because fairies have blessed it.

6. according to the food pyramid, seven year old butter is no longer considered to be a "dairy product," but still isn't quite ready to be used as a building material.

7. it's good luck to keep one (same) pickle in a jar for your entire lifetime.

8. 10 year old gatorade will make you run twice as fast as brand new store bought.

9. aluminum is only a "fair" container of products when considered on geologic timeframes.

10. the biggest advantage of eating out at a restaurant is you know it's nearly impossible to get fed food from your own refrigerator.