conversation of the moment
i went to talk to my company's art designer the other day and stopped in a gas station to grab a drink. it's owned and run by an older chinese guy known to be a character -- his preferred (possibly only) form of spoken communication is yelling. let's pick this up right about where i walk in ...
gas station guy: "HELLO! WHAT YOU LOOKING FOR!?"
b1-66er: "hi. i just want something to drink."
i stand looking for a bit.
he grabs my arm and gestures wildly, "YOU CAN CHOOSE ANYTHING!"
i smile, "that seems like an excellent strategy." i paw through the coolers as he sings liberetto in italian. i put a vanilla coke on the counter.
"THAT'S ALL!?" is he incredulous? i can't tell, but he seems so.
"that's enough, i think."
he hauls back and slaps the counter with a loud crack. "A DOLLAR SEVENTY FIVE!" if the way you declared war was by saying $1.75, this would be war. for sure.
i tend to carry small stacks of $2 bills with me, a currency that is rarely seen (and precisely the reason i carry it). i peel out a 2 and hand it to him.
he's excited. i can tell only because he's yelling louder now. "OH! HOW MANY YOU HAVE?"
i count 'em out. "2's?" assuming he doesn't mean the b.e.p. roll of 100 i have sitting in my car, i count out what i'm carrying and lay them on the counter, "i have eight of 'em."
he puts on a pair of cotton gloves and counts eight dollars out of his cash register, laying them gingerly on the counter. "HERE YOU GO!"
"it's not enough. those are $2 bills. i need $16."
"WHAT?!" he's indignant ...
... and that makes me laugh, "count 'em. multiply. gimme."
he shuffles the bills. "OH! THAT'S NOT ENOUGH! 16 DOLLAR! YOU NEED 16 DOLLAR!"
i wish i'd said that. he puts the original $8 back in the register, counts out $16 in 1's and hands the stack to me.
as i start to leave he grabs me by the shoulder, "THESE MAKE EXCELLENT CHRISTMAS PRESENTS!" i'm pretty sure that's the first time i've ever heard the phrase "christmas presents" screamed in such a way that it seemed like a threat.
"i'm sure they do. you have a good day."
i leave and he goes back to liberetto at precisely the point he left off.
gas station guy: "HELLO! WHAT YOU LOOKING FOR!?"
b1-66er: "hi. i just want something to drink."
i stand looking for a bit.
he grabs my arm and gestures wildly, "YOU CAN CHOOSE ANYTHING!"
i smile, "that seems like an excellent strategy." i paw through the coolers as he sings liberetto in italian. i put a vanilla coke on the counter.
"THAT'S ALL!?" is he incredulous? i can't tell, but he seems so.
"that's enough, i think."
he hauls back and slaps the counter with a loud crack. "A DOLLAR SEVENTY FIVE!" if the way you declared war was by saying $1.75, this would be war. for sure.
i tend to carry small stacks of $2 bills with me, a currency that is rarely seen (and precisely the reason i carry it). i peel out a 2 and hand it to him.
he's excited. i can tell only because he's yelling louder now. "OH! HOW MANY YOU HAVE?"
i count 'em out. "2's?" assuming he doesn't mean the b.e.p. roll of 100 i have sitting in my car, i count out what i'm carrying and lay them on the counter, "i have eight of 'em."
he puts on a pair of cotton gloves and counts eight dollars out of his cash register, laying them gingerly on the counter. "HERE YOU GO!"
"it's not enough. those are $2 bills. i need $16."
"WHAT?!" he's indignant ...
... and that makes me laugh, "count 'em. multiply. gimme."
he shuffles the bills. "OH! THAT'S NOT ENOUGH! 16 DOLLAR! YOU NEED 16 DOLLAR!"
i wish i'd said that. he puts the original $8 back in the register, counts out $16 in 1's and hands the stack to me.
as i start to leave he grabs me by the shoulder, "THESE MAKE EXCELLENT CHRISTMAS PRESENTS!" i'm pretty sure that's the first time i've ever heard the phrase "christmas presents" screamed in such a way that it seemed like a threat.
"i'm sure they do. you have a good day."
i leave and he goes back to liberetto at precisely the point he left off.
posted by b1-66er at 14:00
1 Comments:
HEY.
where'd you go? my link to your site kept saying that you weren't around anymore so i pulled it. normally i wouldn't give a damn, but you're the q.p.l.
what gives?
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